Today morning i woke up with a sick stomach. Could have been all the truth and secrets that the both of us shared. Too much to handle i guess. Could not believe i managed to let go most of my secrecy. Including that very one regret that i had always kept about.
I supposed i didn't know how to react to what he had said so i laughed. After goodbye-goodnight wishes, i sat in my room. It got me thinking really deep. What had just happened?
I didn't expect him to be so intimate with his ex. I was so shocked that i just broke down; literally. I didn't know what i was doing. Honestly i must have felt fear. What am i supposed to do now? Forgive him? Well that was what i thought to myself. If he could forgive me, i believe in vice versa. However the thoughts about them being in a familiar place I've been to before, that sucks. I could not control my imagination because i felt so disgusted.
I could have pretended that i seemed to like it but deep down in me, still is disgusting; definitely. Oh god!
We're all humans after all. Not much of perfection. We make mistakes. No doubt about it. What i fear now is that, i feel like someday he will be taken by somebody else that is way better than me. I feel so helpless now. They always say to think and be positive but did you know that it could be very tiring to stay positive always.
So here i am yet again, dealing with another negative thoughts. I just feel so sick in the stomach!
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