Hopeless

So i haven't been myself lately. I don't know whats got into me but it feels so devilish. I don't like that feeling. At times when that happens, i just need a time on my own. Much preferable to avoid being around people before i start thinking so negatively. I bet you must have gone through a situation whereby you're mad at someone but there's this latter whom would annoy you like putting more oil to the fire.

I feel so empty. I must have thrown away all those hopes and promises considering that it relates more to how i feel. I used to have had felt numbed and i'm trying to put more effort in trying to open myself up again in believing people. Perhaps I've been into troubles and had the worst messy life before. Yet again i must have been too gullible.

Today wasn't a good day at all but being at work, syukur that everything went well. Just that i was very late for the very first time during my attachment period. My day at work ended with alhamdulilah but not all event would turn out so good. There are people who would seemingly may not make promises they say but if they continuously emphasize on doing the things that they don't wish to make promises, it just seemed to me that it's something they want to do and a promise they wish to make it come true.

So my day ended with me being so sour and not being my usual self. That sucks!

I would always turn to my best friend and how much joy to hear her voice after so many days not being able to have the time to meet her. After all attachment has been hard on us. Life goes on.

It's good to have someone who would care so much even though i know she's the one whom i should listen more to instead of her listening to my stories and rants.

I'll just end everything here for today. Sometimes there are things that are better to be left unsaid because at the end of the day, you'll realized that complaining and letting everything unleashed won't help you much even if it means trying to make someone understand but they don't. It's like a waste of effort.